Divorce can be a difficult time for people. It’s an emotional roller coaster that can be overwhelming at times.
A support system is important during this time. A friend, therapist, or divorce coach can help keep your emotions in check so that you can make good decisions.
1. Don’t judge
Divorce can be a hard thing to deal with. It can come as a surprise and may leave you feeling confused, sad or regretful.
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It can also be frustrating when you’re negotiating with your spouse in front of a stranger who is tasked with dividing up everything from the house to the kids.
But it’s important to remember that a divorce doesn’t make you a bad person. In fact, it may be an indicator of a strong, empowered self-actualized human being who made the decision to end a marriage that wasn’t working for them or their children.
2. Don’t offer advice
Divorce can be a difficult time. It can cause you to lose sight of goals and plans. It can also make you feel like a victim, and that’s not a healthy mindset to have.
Luckily, there are plenty of people who understand your situation and will offer you some much needed support. Just be picky about whom you trust with your most important decisions.
3. Don’t take sides
During a divorce, it can be difficult for mutual friends to stay friendly with both parties. Sometimes, they will pick sides or form opinions about the other party in the divorce.
Taking sides can be painful for both parties and it can also cause long-term psychological damage.
Children shouldn’t be forced to choose a side in a divorce.
Unless there are safety concerns, children benefit from having healthy relationships with both parents. Forcing them to pick sides can be a big stress for the kids and will lead to resentment in the future.
4. Don’t compare
Everyone’s circumstances and backstories are different, so comparing your divorce settlement to another person’s will only cause you stress.
It may seem like the person with more assets got a better deal, but it’s not fair.
It’s important not to compare your relationship to others because you’ll never be satisfied. You’ll always feel like you’re missing out on something or someone that belongs to them.
5. Don’t criticize
Criticizing your partner can be damaging to your relationship, and experts say it’s one of the top predictors of divorce. It erodes away the positive feelings that make a marriage work, and it can lead to other negative interaction patterns that destroy the couple bubble.
If you criticize your partner frequently, consider couples therapy to learn more about how to communicate in a healthy way. Your therapist will help you understand why this behavior is so destructive and how to avoid it.
6. Don’t try to fix
While it may be tempting to try and repair a broken marriage, it is best to simply walk away. This allows you to focus on your sanity, your future, and a new start.
One of the more expensive and arduous parts of a divorce is child custody, so you might want to enlist the help of a family lawyer to navigate these tricky waters. This can be a time consuming process, but it will likely save you a lot of heartache down the road. Be sure to set a solid budget and stick to it.
7. Don’t rush them
Divorce is a major life change and should be taken slowly. Rushing the divorce process can lead to hasty decisions, premature agreements and a poorly planned future for one or both parties. Divorce lawyers in Harrisburg, PA can assist with the legal process but still take the time and be attentive to the matter.
Often, people who rush into a divorce end up dividing their assets unevenly. This can result in a lot of wasted money and frustration.
It also means that they won’t have the time to heal properly, which can make them feel less confident about dating and relationships in general. Therefore, it’s important to wait until you’re ready to date again.